We smile, laugh, shout, cry, and hurt. These are just some physical manifestations of our varied emotions as human beings. Our rational mind can identify necessary emotion in every circumstance we are at. It becomes beneficial for us not to suppress our emotions but expressing them gives us a certain relief feeling. Contrary to the latter, it may cause emotional breakdown- which is an “out-of-the-mind” mental state. In the same manner that the mind can drive our emotion, the mind can be driven by emotion. The latter is a mental tendency referred to as emotional. This uncontrolled and unpredictable state of the mind can be dangerous both for the person himself and others surrounding him. While the mind processes information (stimulus) but emotion responds to situation (stimulus); we must allow our mind to form a good response for a given situation. Good decisions are often products of careful thinking while bad decisions are mostly the results of careless feeling. How we express our emotion reveals our mental condition.
Various fields of science have become fascinated in conducting study and research to understand emotion and how it affects a child’s development. “Emotional Intelligence” was not a common word to academic institutions until it appeared in the title of Wayne Leon Payne’s doctoral dissertation in 1985. Since then, plenty of books were published and many tests were conducted to determine the child’s emotional intelligence. As a result there are conflicting opinions as to how to define and measure emotional intelligence. But one thing I found common to these different definitions is emotional intelligence is a “mental” ability. In other words, it is the function of the mind. And the fact that it is an “ability”, it can be further modified and developed.
Problem, conflict, violation of rights and values often trigger our emotional nerves and they may affect how we handle the situation. Though Apostle Paul’s freely expressed a variety of emotions (Philippians 1:1-30) through his letters, but his knowledge of Jesus helped him deal every difficult circumstance wisely. Likewise, our experiences, education, and environment play a significant part in shaping our thoughts, but only through personal encounter with Jesus can we draw wisdom in dealing with our emotion. I would say emotional wisdom and wholeness must be the by-product of a renewed mind (Ro. 12: 2). We cannot avoid negative circumstances but we can avoid circumstances affecting us negatively.
In my few years of being involved in youth ministry I can be easily devastated by criticism of people against my leadership style. It would take a while before I can get over and re-compose myself to minister again. But I found out that as I time goes by, I have learned to handle my emotions. I am reminded that Paul had to suffer physically, emotionally, and spiritually in proclaiming the gospel. Even Jesus had to suffer the pain and humiliation of the cross up to death for my redemption. I saw my sufferings more bearable than theirs. Suffering is the mark of the true disciple of Christ; and finding joy amidst the pain comes only after understanding the divine will of God revealed in his words and through circumstances we experience. God must be the source of emotional wisdom.
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