One thing I’ve learned from doing ministry was that problems, troubles, differences and crises are inevitable. I find some of these disturbances are beyond my control while some are direct results of my immature behavior. Regardless of the cause, they affect how I do ministry. I remember a year ago, I was desperate to pay my loan from the bank because it’s gaining a lot of interest. I couldn’t help but think what I must do to pay that debt which led me to almost quitting my ministry so I could find another job to earn much. But at the same time having doubt whether my decision would be the wisest decision I will ever make. Fortunately, that circumstance led me to study the Biblical principles on money and final management.
In some instances when my team was asking for budget in one of our youth programs, we ended up in frustration and felt forsaken. We just thought the leaders didn’t buy our idea, or at least they just didn’t want to help us. Sometimes it could go beyond arguments, which I would take it personally and I would harbor anger over that person. I was humbled upon realizing that I was just hurting my own self had I continue in this child-like attitude. I was not also modeling a good example to the young people or to my youth leadership team as well.
But even if these problems are kept on uprising, and every day I am exposed to them, I have learned to pursue serving God in spite of the conflict. Never again will my ministry suffer because of unresolved personal issues. On the hand, I am very thankful that I have experienced them in my early years of service because it makes a lot of sense if similar situation comes forth in the future. It’s encouraging to know and to draw lessons from personal experiences. They are all part of the formative years that I must experience as minister of God. “Delight yourself in the LORD and he will give you the desires of your heart” (Prov. 37:4). I have matured at some sort through the problems and crises, and it is my ultimate goal to be completely transformed into a Christ-like way of solving them.
I also believe that God can use every circumstance to establish his purpose for us. Paul says “And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose” (Ro. 8:28). The way I face these challenges now is very different from the past. In fact, I have always encouraged my team to see them as stepping stones rather stumbling blocks. Every time we experience them, we see them as opportunities for us to grow and serve God better. At the end of the day, it’s not what we experienced but what was have we become that makes it significant.
Marriage: A Context on Spiritual Formation and Maturity
I was born and raised by responsible parents. That’s how I say it not just because they are my parents; but they have done everything to provide for our needs. They have known and accepted the Lord Jesus Christ since we were kids. That’s why I could say we grew up in a Christian community. However, being just new Christians then, our parents have struggled in their relationship with each other. I could just recall one vivid memories of their quarrel that led to our mother’s attempt to leave our father. In fact, she attempted several times in the past which I could hardly recall as kid. Every time she would attempt to leave, my father would beg her to stay. She also realized that she could not afford to raise us in a dysfunctional family.
When our father boarded the ship as domestic seaman, our mother has continued in deepening her relationship with God. Unfortunately, our father went back to drinking liquor. It was this vice that they used to argue about before. Despite of that, our father labored enough to provide for our needs and to secure our future through education. Surprisingly, God has done something to our mother. She had learned to love our father the way he was. She had improved in controlling her temper each time she saw him drunk. Since then, I had never seen them fight that way they fought before. What I saw was my mother’s genuine love for our father. In effect, when our father died on December 2006, she was greatly affected and she mourned for him until she was hospitalized for depression.
God has used our church family who prayed for and encouraged her through exhortation. Now she has continued in serving God, reaching our neighbors and helping some of our relatives with dysfunctional family. My older brother married a matured Christian wife, blessed with lovely daughter and another baby to come. My younger brother is also actively serving the Lord in our home church and also one of the young adults that I disciple. Our family is busy serving and honoring God!
Every time my friends ask me when I am going to get married, I would always say, “when I reach 35”. But my point was, I am not ready yet, I am not prepared yet, and it is not my priority. I am not ready because I am still praying and searching for someone. I am not financially prepared at this time to marry her, even if I have her and we’re engaged today. And it is not priority because I am enjoying my life serving God while I’m single! In addition to this, I am seeing my relatives whose children are suffering from their poverty and unplanned marriage. I thought it is just a fear. Through the years of learning, re-learning, and affirmation, I have learned that it is the perspective of a renewed mind in Christ Jesus. And as youth pastor, it is my responsibility to model this perspective to my youth and young adults and to next generations.
When our father boarded the ship as domestic seaman, our mother has continued in deepening her relationship with God. Unfortunately, our father went back to drinking liquor. It was this vice that they used to argue about before. Despite of that, our father labored enough to provide for our needs and to secure our future through education. Surprisingly, God has done something to our mother. She had learned to love our father the way he was. She had improved in controlling her temper each time she saw him drunk. Since then, I had never seen them fight that way they fought before. What I saw was my mother’s genuine love for our father. In effect, when our father died on December 2006, she was greatly affected and she mourned for him until she was hospitalized for depression.
God has used our church family who prayed for and encouraged her through exhortation. Now she has continued in serving God, reaching our neighbors and helping some of our relatives with dysfunctional family. My older brother married a matured Christian wife, blessed with lovely daughter and another baby to come. My younger brother is also actively serving the Lord in our home church and also one of the young adults that I disciple. Our family is busy serving and honoring God!
Every time my friends ask me when I am going to get married, I would always say, “when I reach 35”. But my point was, I am not ready yet, I am not prepared yet, and it is not my priority. I am not ready because I am still praying and searching for someone. I am not financially prepared at this time to marry her, even if I have her and we’re engaged today. And it is not priority because I am enjoying my life serving God while I’m single! In addition to this, I am seeing my relatives whose children are suffering from their poverty and unplanned marriage. I thought it is just a fear. Through the years of learning, re-learning, and affirmation, I have learned that it is the perspective of a renewed mind in Christ Jesus. And as youth pastor, it is my responsibility to model this perspective to my youth and young adults and to next generations.
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